We have celebrated our 5th year in marriage and it’s been a beautiful journey that we wanted to share some of the lessons we learnt and we hope whoever reads this can learn from this and use some or most of the lessons to your advantage or even if your not married just to give you a view of what marriage could be like.
Sacrifice may sound awful, but it is one of the purest ways to show love to someone. Saying “I love you” is good, and necessary; but, giving of yourself, time after time, is proof that you really mean what you say. Cooking dinner every night when you are tired is a sacrifice. Getting up two hours early each morning to earn the income your family needs by working overtime is a sacrifice.
Marriages are full of opportunities to sacrifice, but they’re even good for us too. They build character in us and intimacy between us and our loved ones. If you are in a relationship with someone who normally refuses to go without their own comforts and pleasures, seriously consider the impact of that dynamic for your future.
When it is hard to sacrifice for your spouse, especially if he or she has not treated you with love and respect, remember the ultimate sacrifice: view Christ as your example of sacrificial giving (Romans 5:8).
In these past years of marriage we have definitely seen the importance of being united as a couple in all that you do because you can achieve more together.
No marriage can work without unity.
Firstly, Amos 3:3 asks “can two walk together except they agree? The obvious answer is ‘NO’. Marriage is a journey not a destination. It consists of two differing personalities (male and female) who, most of the time, have different orientations and backgrounds.
marriage is far beyond co-habiting. It means to be physically, spiritually, financially, sexually, materially, in fact, “all-roundly” united.
Eph 5:24 says “Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything”. Therefore, it will be practically impossible for two people to exist in this manner except they are united.
A good marriage thrives on the open exchange of emotion, desires, and beliefs. In fact, communication is one of the most important aspects of a satisfying marriage. Most marriages go through rough times, which can change the way spouses communicate with each other. Many couples develop bad habits and create destructive patterns when things aren’t going well
Nobody’s born a natural communicator. Like riding a bike or hitting a baseball, communication in marriage is a skill you can learn. And good communication is the key to improving your relationship.
Patience is something you must have in a good marriage. Without patience the calm in a marriage would be out of control.
Patience is when you ask for something to be done and it may take hours or days and anger doesn’t set in.
Patience is when you are in a hurry and your partner is not coming- you were patient and found out that the reason that he was late was because he stopped to pick up flowers for you.
Patience is when you are discussing an important issue and you wait for the other person’s comments to be made before continuing with your own thoughts. It is a give and take conversation.
Patience occurs when compromises must be made.
Patience occurs when your spouse does something and you don’t understand why, but you are wait and you try understand instead of rushing to conclusions.
If you have patience, you will have a piece of the puzzle for a happy and successful marriage.
Many marriages become stuck because forgiveness is not a central tenant of the marriage. When problems arise, some couples become absolutely mired in a tit-for-tat cycle that puts brinkmanship and “settling the score” ahead of addressing and mitigating anger
Forgiveness in marriage is an essential component for a successful relationship. You and your partners ability to seek and grant forgiveness is highly significant to attain marital satisfaction.
Forgiveness in married life allows you to step out of the role of a victim and shows that you are capable of acknowledging your hurt and move on from it. Forgiveness in marriage is a skill that helps couples to process negative emotions and acts in order to build a stronger bond
The idea of forgiving your partner who hurt you or made you angry can be the hardest thing to implement in a relationship. Letting go of your partners misdeeds necessitates you to let go of your resentment against them.
I hope the above lessons learned is something you can learn and implement when the time comes.